Letter To My Sisters Who Have Chosen Abortion

Dear Sister, Sweet One,

I will not pretend to know what you have gone through. I know that most of the time, abortion is chosen because of desperation. I can’t even begin to imagine the confusion, the loneliness, the pain that has been a part of your story.

I can imagine, however, the people have misused your story. The pro-choice folks told you that you did what was best for you, that you exercised your right as a woman. I’m sure that pro-life people have used your pain and guilt to make a point. I can imagine the lengths you go to keep this secret.

This is not my attempt to put myself in your shoes. I cannot relate. But I want to tell you something you emphatically need to know: you are deeply loved by God. Do you believe that? Do you believe that God isn’t mad at you for your choice? That He wants to heal your hurt and redeem your pain?

Sister, He can use anything. We give Him dust and ashes, and with that, He makes beautiful things—even this pain-filled experience that is called, an abortion. He can make the choice that was made apart from His wisdom something that will grow His kingdom. He can take your hurt, the tears you’ve cried and redeem it for His glory. He can give your pain a purpose. And, He loves you and wants you to come to Him.

As someone who is pro-life, please know this: I love you fiercely. I am so sorry you felt this was your only way out, that this was your only choice. And, I am here and I want to understand your pain. If you’re having a tough day, I would love to be the one you call to remind you that God loves you and can restore you.

When I say the wrong thing, please kindly tell me something better to say next time. When I am insensitive or angry, please forgive me. If you ever feel like I’m not on your side, tell me so I can make it right.

See, when the church takes a strong stance on anything, people at odds with that stance rarely feel accepted or welcomed. Let me tell you, as soon as you feel rejected because of your past mistakes, those Christians are at odds with God. The Creator who made you and wants to redeem you calls that church to love you. Love doesn’t mean full acceptance, but it does mean they should care for you and receive you with open arms. They should be a part of your healing.

I say all this to say, I’m sorry for the pain you’ve felt. I’m sorry for the path you’ve walked. And, I’m sorry if any Christian has made you feel like you cannot receive God’s blessing because of your path. That could not be further from the truth. All have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God. If you can have a humble heart, God wants to use this heartbreak to bring about a path of redemption. Will you seek Him, sister?

And in the meantime, I will be right next to you. I will be with you in your pain, and I’ll stay next to you as you are restored and reconciled to Him who loves you.

Always here,
Ashley

Photo by Luis Galvez

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Ashley Trammell

Ashley Trammell

Chispa Magazine writer Ashley Trammell is a wife and a stay-at-home mom to her three kiddos. She has a deep love for the written word and the Word of God. Through that love, she brings her fire and passion to Chispa, that the women who dive in together would be more like Christ in every way. She grew up in the mid-west, but most recently has been on mission in Texas and Georgia. Being in love with reading inspired Ashley to study English Literature at the University of Central Oklahoma. An avid reader, a coffee connoisseur, a football enthusiast, and a sushi devotee: these are just a few of Ashley's favorite things. Plus, she recently founded Two Fourteen Paperie Two Fourteen Paperie, which provides custom invitations and greeting cards to all. 214, the area code for Dallas, Texas. Where she met and married her husband, where her three babies were born, and where Jesus met her and showed her He saves by grace through faith. 214, their new home address in Georgia. A little over a year ago, her little family moved from Texas to Georgia. It’s been a sweet adventure for the five of them, and The Father has been faithful and kind to grow their trust of Him there. 214 for her favorite bible verse, Colossians 2:14, which says, “He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross.” Jesus is her why, and also her how. Ashley is also a survivor of sexual assault and has a deep desire to see God bring beauty from the ashes. He is in the redemption business, and through His truth and grace, through our Redeemer, we can have healing.
Ashley Trammell

Latest posts by Ashley Trammell (see all)

Ashley Trammell

Chispa Magazine writer Ashley Trammell is a wife and a stay-at-home mom to her three kiddos. She has a deep love for the written word and the Word of God. Through that love, she brings her fire and passion to Chispa, that the women who dive in together would be more like Christ in every way. She grew up in the mid-west, but most recently has been on mission in Texas and Georgia. Being in love with reading inspired Ashley to study English Literature at the University of Central Oklahoma. An avid reader, a coffee connoisseur, a football enthusiast, and a sushi devotee: these are just a few of Ashley's favorite things. Plus, she recently founded Two Fourteen Paperie Two Fourteen Paperie, which provides custom invitations and greeting cards to all. 214, the area code for Dallas, Texas. Where she met and married her husband, where her three babies were born, and where Jesus met her and showed her He saves by grace through faith. 214, their new home address in Georgia. A little over a year ago, her little family moved from Texas to Georgia. It’s been a sweet adventure for the five of them, and The Father has been faithful and kind to grow their trust of Him there. 214 for her favorite bible verse, Colossians 2:14, which says, “He canceled the record of the charges against us and took it away by nailing it to the cross.” Jesus is her why, and also her how. Ashley is also a survivor of sexual assault and has a deep desire to see God bring beauty from the ashes. He is in the redemption business, and through His truth and grace, through our Redeemer, we can have healing.