Erica Basora Campbell: Wife, Mother to Jolyn + Ava, and RN BSN.
What have you overcome? Identifying with the words “I am a Christian,” the expectation is you will never face trails or hardships. Once you declare that Jesus is your Lord and Savior your supposed to live the good life, maybe even an easy life, a life that would be full of joy and happiness. Why? Because Jesus controls everything in the universe and He supposed to take care of me. If I am good, follow Him, go to church, tithe, and do all the things “Christians” are supposed to do, I am safe. Yet, after years of being a Christian I experienced depression.
My depression has a name, it was “postpartum depression.” After giving birth to my beautiful baby girl I couldn’t understand why I had these unwanted feelings. I was always tired, I couldn’t get it together, the baby would cry; I would cry, I would hear a song and cry. All I wanted was sleep and I felt so alone. I couldn’t possibly take good care of this baby. Nothing was like the movies. I wasn’t happy and I couldn’t seem to shake it off. It hurts me to say that I had these feelings; I’ve even beaten myself up because I can’t remember the first couple of months of my daughter’s life. I missed out on enjoying her, because I felt so alone, overwhelmed and distant. Could I truly have been depressed? Why? How could this be, didn’t I have everything?
During this time I had an idea that I might be suffering from postpartum depression. My husband’s aunt who is a nurse explained the signs and symptoms to my husband. However, my doctors never really screened me for it. If they screened me would I have been honest? I wasn’t supposed to be depressed. How could I be going through depression? Yet, deep down I knew things weren’t right with how I was feeling. I had to learn more about why I was feeling the way I was feeling.
When Jolyn was six months I began nursing school and studied postpartum depression. In my research I learned I wasn’t alone and that depression is real. I learned there is need for assessment and education for families and women suffering postpartum depression. I had to be honest with myself. Researching and writing was part of my healing process. In addition to my faith, support from my husband and the Word of God helped me get through this stage of my life. I had to cling onto the promises Jesus gives us, and what He says about me. I know that my healing pathway may not necessarily work for others who suffer from depression. However, it’s important to acknowledge what is happening, seek counseling, and even receive medical assistance. We are never alone, and the more we talk about depression the more people will become aware of this and how to help others. We live in an imperfect world and will experience trials; however, it’s how we allow trials to shape us and leaning into our Creator to help us through the journey is important, very important.
For more of Erica Basora Campbell, and the many faces of perseverance order your copy The Overcoming Issue here.